I havent been too active on here lately and it sucks, because I love this blog. It is so much of part of me and my journey. I have been trying to focus on myself lately. Doing a deep-dive if… Read More ›
self-care
Chronic Fatigue is definitely a thing, and PCOS sucks.
Here’s why… I know a product of PCOS is chronic fatigue. It is also a symptom of mental illness. Being tired all of the time is ruthless though. When people say “I’m tired,” you know they generally mean they are… Read More ›
I lost the colors…
I feel this need to write. Like an ache in my soul. But as I sit here, staring at this screen, I have nothing. No pretty words, no uplifting quotes, no positive outlook. I am devoid even of anger. I… Read More ›
The Definition of Consent.
You want to know what means Yes? The word Yes. It’s that simple. Photo by Mihai Surdu on Unsplash
Falling Leaves is everything the world needs right now.
I am longing for fall so badly it aches inside. I hate the summer. When I was in high school summer was my escape. Lying by the pool, soaking up the sun, getting tan and swimming in my parents pool…. Read More ›
Salt and Sadness
Have you ever stood on a Cliffside in the middle of the night and contemplated the jump Looked into the darkness with the wind whipping around you Watched the waves crashing against the rocks Have you envisioned the biting cold… Read More ›
“I don’t even know how I feel lately…”
I feel like I am failing right now. I know that it’s a high possibility that this is just my brain doing what it does and filling me with negative self-talk, but I feel so much shame and sadness for… Read More ›
But first xanax is: www.butfirstxanax.com
Hello everyone! I just wanted to let everyone know that my page is now simply, but first, Xanax http://www.butfirstxanax.com I am beyond excited to make my blog easier to read and navigate, and more aesthetically pleasing. I also wanted to… Read More ›
The things about OCD that people without OCD don’t know.
So I have OCD, or Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. It’s very mild compared to others, and I am so grateful for that. What I learned through my diagnosis though was that there are many symptoms of OCD that people probably are… Read More ›
Personing is hard.
I got to thinking the other night, it’s hard to be a person. Like, how am I supposed to do all the things? I have to complete all my schoolwork and meet all those deadlines while actually achieving good grades…. Read More ›
High School and…Death?
So I was looking at a Facebook page for the graduating year of my High School class, and I noticed quite a few people who passed away from that year. What surprised me wasn’t their deaths but more my emotions… Read More ›
Time keeps on slipping, into the future…
I can feel my mental health slipping right now, and it is rough. I waited too long to fill a few of my medications, and of course, they won’t be here until the end of next week, so that’s fun…. Read More ›
Since everyone is talking about Quarantine…
Today I am tired. Tired of everyone’s shit. Tired of the annoying drivers on the road. Tired of bills. Tired of work. REALLY tired of homework and professors. Tired of quarantine. Tired of everyone being sick. Tired of worrying. Tired… Read More ›
PCOS and Periods. (Or lack thereof)
So here’s the thing, with my particular brand of PCOS I don’t have periods. Like ever. Which is great, sort of. I had really horrible periods in high school then they just stopped. I can’t really remember when exactly I… Read More ›
New Endings
The most amazing thing happened last night. I was doing my normal nighttime routine, taking my medication when I realized I’ve only been taking three meds. I normally take five. I was floored. I stopped to think when the last… Read More ›
The Grinch (The Jim Carrey Version FYI)
As you get older do you relate to the Grinch more or is that just me? I am going to outline a few very good reasons why I totally feel like the Grinch is my secret soul twin lately. He… Read More ›
Crepes
I helped you cook a lot, chopping and cutting and spicing, but I distinctly remember two occasions when we really cooked. Once we made crepes. We mixed the thin batter and poured it in the pan. You showed me how… Read More ›
What I learned about life from having 3 little girls do my makeup.
***I had written this a long time ago and completely forgotten about it until I was cleaning my computer out and found it again. These girls are not so little anymore but the lessons I learned from them still remain…. Read More ›
Are some things too private for the internet?
I’ve made it my MO to basically put it all out there. I have friends and family who regularly read this blog but I decided from the very first post I wrote here that if I posted at all I… Read More ›
Happiness or…Mania?
The dark clouds start lifting, you feel like you can breathe again. The warmth is seeping back into your bones. The light is returning…or is it? This is one of the worst feelings about bipolar. When you’ve been in a… Read More ›
